How to survive Valentine’s Day as a menopausal woman

With Valentine’s Day, just around the corner, it can be stressful and place undue pressure on relationships. Perhaps your libido has taken a nose-dive or your partner just doesn’t understand what you’re going through. Let’s face it, our bodies have changed and our priorities too. But, don’t worry, there are things you can do to put the romance back into your relationship:

It’s not all about sex! Our libido can take a real knock during the menopause so it’s vital we adjust our bodies and, most importantly, minds too. Don’t put unnecessary pressure onyourself. If sex is out of the question, don’t worry as there are so many ways of being intimate, romantic & sensual. Some couples kiss a lot, others bring back romantic gestures that may have been missing in their relationship. Just be honest and open with your partner.

Be confident. No one is expecting you to look like your twenty-something year old self. It’s normal to put on weight during the menopause, especially around your middle. So, don’t beat yourself up. Make some simple lifestyle tweaks, getting more active and cutting back on certain foods can help you to feel more positive about yourself. Embrace this new version of you and your partner will too.

Be prepared. As your oestrogen levels dip, you may suffer from vaginal dryness. We know it’s not the sexiest of symptoms but it’s normal. Don’t worry, there’s a wealth of products available for women. You can try vaginal moisturisers which should be used regularly to help moisturise your vagina. For sex, try a lubricant which is available from your doctor or at your local chemist or buy online from YesYesYes, Sylk or Replens. Don’t be embarrassed to seek help, ask your pharmacist about buying Gina over the counter, or ask your doctor to prescribe this or Vagifem which is a low dose vaginal oestrogen.

Get practicing. If it’s been awhile (let’s be honest — menopause does make you hot, but usually not for sex), consider warming yourself up before getting intimate with your partner. Take some advice from sex therapist SuziGodson.com who advocates getting to know yourself  so your partner can learn what really works for you. Find ways to be intimate, sensual or romantic without feeling the need to perform or please your partner – this has to work for both of you.

Have fun. However you choose to spend your Valentine’s Day, enjoy. Don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself or your partner. Valentine’s Day is all about love and a bit of fun!